I awoke early this morning, the house was cold, but I was warm under the covers with my little "Penny" heater stretched out beside me. As I lay there in the dark waiting for the coffee to brew I thought about what I wanted for the the year ahead. 2010 is over and with it closes a sad chapter in my life, saying goodbye to Lilylovekin. 2011 is a new year open to possiblities. I am not one for making resolutions since I always break them and then feel guilty and awful about myself. This year I am picking a word-one word to represent what I want for the new year. GRACE. Willingness, patience, kindness, understanding, gratitude, humility. Many things come to mind when I think of the word grace and they are words I want to fill my life with. Of course life is a bumpy road and it all sounds good on paper but I can hold the words close to my heart and know that it is about the journey and be thankful for the word forgiveness. I hope you all have a wonderful New Year. My world is a brighter nicer place because of all of you and I thank you all for being there. Lorrie
Spoiled rotten, thats what I was this Christmas. Part of my gift was a day at the spa, my mother and I went and had massages on Christmas eve, it was a delightful way to spend the day. A beautiful hand dyed scarf from Lorri Scott of Wayward Threads was a complete surprise and one that I adore, I love her work. My husband gave me a little POGO printer that will be so much fun to have, I'll be able to use it at the trailer, it takes tiny little 2x3 polaroid prints and works off a battery. Along with the wonderful gifts I got was the gift of memories, new memories and old. Having dinner with my aunt, she had cooked a meal in the tradition of my grandmother and it brought back memories of Christmas past. Childhood memories of Christmas eve spent at my grandmothers with aunts, uncles, cousins, in a crowded tiny house, tables overflowing, presents everywhere, laughter and noise. At times a little overwhelming for a protected shy little girl but I loved every minute of it. It is good to remember the memories of the past and I treasure them greatly. I hope you all created some good memories this holiday season.
Currently I have nothing going on. My life is rather boring and dull, but to me it feels peaceful and calm. This is what I did this rainy Sunday finished reading a book, had coffee with my best friend, sat in front of a fire, and held a warm dog in my lap. I am waiting for the next thing to happen. We leave Thursday for a trip to Scottsdale to spend Christmas with my mother, it will be the first time in years we have been together for this holiday. I'm looking forward to it. My presents are wrapped and under the tree, there is no last minute frenzy to take part in-I am ready. I hope you all are having a happy and joyous holiday season.
As I said earlier I've been cleaning and sorting. Going slowly through things getting a jump start on spring cleaning. I've spent time in my second bedroom, it is full of all my art supplies. The supplies slow me to a near stop, at every turn I see something I've forgotten. Projects partially done, items bought for projects not started. I found this little piece tucked away in the corner and dusted it off, it was something I made a while back and had forgotten about-well it is the perfect home for the little Cathy Cullis doll I had sitting on my bookcase that needed a home. Check out her blog she does beautiful paintings, embroidery, and has a poetry blog. Treasures keep popping up around my house it is like Christmas a week early.
A MEMORY IS WHAT IS LEFT WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENS AND DOES NOT COMPLETELY UNHAPPEN. edward de bono. I've had some time off and we usually go to our trailer but due to weather we are staying home. So instead I've been cleaning, sorting, and throwing things away. Going through "my stuff" stirring up memories. I still miss Lily every day and often think I hear her in the house. I found this old photo of the three of us taken one winter day in Santa Fe. I remember the day so clearly, it was beautiful. Sparkling snow like diamonds, Lily running through the woods, she loved to dig and roll in snow. Crisp fresh air to breath. Good memories and ones I love to reflect on. It slows down the cleaning process but makes it like a treasure hunt full of precious times and moments.
TODAY YOU ARE YOU, THAT IS TRUER THAN TRUE. THERE IS NO ONE ALIVE WHO IS YOUER THAN YOU. dr. seuss. It is one of those rainy lazy Sundays. I'm sitting by my space heater keeping nice and warm and thinking about how over all my life is good. Today I am happy to be me. That has taken me some work and time, it was not always like that. Liking myself I find I have to be true to myself and that is something I still work at, it is difficult for me to set boundaries. I'm still afraid of hurting peoples feelings, and need to learn ways to be gentle and kind. Being true to myself requires that I know myself, my inner voice is very quiet and I have to listen carefully. Surrounding myself with positive people helps keep that voice alive and is one of the things I've done to help myself. It meant cutting out the negative, which has not been easy but has been so important for me. Everyday I learn more, for me life is about the journey and so every day has become very important, and not just another step towards some final destination. My photo is of a Nina Bagley charm, you can find her work at Ornamental.