Saturday, April 16, 2011

April's loss

EVERY BEGINNING AFTER ALL IS NOTHING BUT A SEQUEL, AND THE BOOK OF EVENTS IS ALWAYS OPEN IN THE MIDDLE. wislawa szymborska. April a month of beginnings. It is in nature everywhere. Bright green, tender buds, baby birds, fresh sweet scents. But for me April also is a month of endings. I have lost very dear ones to me in April. It is a confusing month. For outside spring is in full bloom, there is new life at every turn. My heart is full of conflicting emotion these past days. Thinking much of the past, time spent with loved ones, thinking about what was, and wondering about what might have been. Sharpness of intense pain has eased to a familiar ache. I enjoy the beauty of the new beginnings and see the start of life again. Knowing that I'm in the middle of a multi layered story with many good byes, hellos, and loves makes it all worth while in the end.


  1. I know exactly what you mean by that, having just spent some time feeling very similar feelings. It's confusing, isn't it? But then I make it back to the present moment and in that moment, all is well! I am glad you are finding your way away from the sharp pain!! Much love, Silke

  2. I also know what you mean, Lorrie. I have lost a number of loved ones in spring - and that changed the way I see this season forever...
    But it is also a time of renewal - and nothing is every really lost.
    The fabric of life has many different threads and they, in turn, create the tapestry.
    Wishing you a lovely Sunday.

  3. What a beautiful and poignant post...poetic and yet tragic. I can't begin to try to imagine your circumstances, but I do know I care about your state of mind. I'm glad your book is open to the middle, and I hope that you'll not leaf backwards through the pages, but rather read forward, with a fresh, spring-like attitude and keep your face to the sun, it's much more difficult to see the shadows that way! I wish you happy days ahead.

  4. A beautiful post indeed. I also enjoyed reading the comments left by other readers. I hope that springtime will be enjoyable and bring a sense of renewal. It always does that for me. Have a lovely rest of this beautiful Sunday.